Making Amends & Communication

I recently wrote about someone who was
interested in me and didn't act on it,
and now there is someone else who is
trying to make amends with me.

I am wondering what is going on. The
most interesting thing for me about
this all is the fact that there is
someone I would like to hear from who
remains distant for reasons I don't
know, and therefore couldn't begin to
understand.

I tell you these things because life
doesn't always go the way we want it
to go. Sometimes it takes twists and
turns, and ties us up in knots. As
frustrating as people and situations
can be, it's how we handle it that will
make all the difference.

I tell you these things, too,
because there is sometimes a tendency
for people to feel as though they are
alone in their experiences...which
couldn't be farther from the truth.

However, when we don't talk about
what we exerience, it is easy to
think that you're the only one.
The problem is there are a lot of
things we don't talk about for
fear of shame, judgment, and a
myriad of other reasons.

I have found many times there is
a sense of relief that comes
when a person discovers that he
isn't alone in his sadness, his
quirks, his disappointments, his
joys. We seem to want to share,
and be connected, and yet we
so often put blocks in our way -
including our reaction to those
who might come back to us.

If a person comes back, perhaps
there is something to explore,
perhaps there is something to
learn, or some closure to be had.
To be emotional and block it is
to potentially block an
opportunity. You never know
what is possible until you open
up the channels of communication.

Of course, the same holds in
reverse. If you feel like you
should go back to someone, perhaps
there is something to explore,
learn, or some closure to be had.
To be emotional and block it is
to potentially block an
opportunity. You never know
what is possible until you open
up the channels of communication.

Consider being kind if someone
comes knocking on your door, and
consider that that person whose
door you go knocking on may not
have the perspective you do, so
it might be a little more
challenging. At the same time,
consider that your communications
are a welcome "relief," as they
had a strong desire to talk to you,
and they'll be more welcoming than
you might expect.

Everyone is just doing the best
they can, and there are times
you may be in a position to lead,
and there may be other times it
could be to your advantage to
have the other person take the
lead.

Closure allows for new beginnings
with the same person, or a new
one. There are no set rules,
despite the fact that most of us
often would like some. So...
anything is possible when you are
willing to allow others to be who
they are even in the midst of your
own frustrations and disappointment.

Consider that kindness to another
can be one of the greatest gifts to
give yourself, and that it might
just be the beginning of other good
things to come...or, at the very
least, it may create a clearing for
possibilities that weren't possible
while you were closed off and emotional.

Of course, there will be exceptions
to what I am talking about, as there
are some unhealthy, obsessive dynamics
that can sometimes come into play.

What I talk about is never absolute:
for everyone, every time. However,
if it resonates for you, there
may be a thing, or two, for you to
consider and and an action, or two,
to take.

Here's to more love and loving
communication in all of our lives!

Have a great day!