night. It was an episode I have often thought
about, as I have seen it before.
In it one man bets another man $500,000 that
he is unable to be silent for a year. The
second man can't seem to stop talking, and
is always asking for money, so the first man
figures he'll take the bet, but only last a
few weeks - at most. He considers it an easy
bet to win.
It is discovered that the second man also
has financial difficulties, and a wife
who apparently buys jewels the way other
women buy groceries so it only adds to
the reasons why the man would be an easy mark
for the bet that he could never likely win.
The second man is wise enough to ask for the
money ahead of time, but the first man acts
insulted, and says of course he has it; the
other man has to trust him.
The second man is to live within a glass
enclosure for a year, and you see him day
after day, month after month not talking.
The first man offers him $1000 at one point
to walk away, and then $5000, but the man
won't do it.
Finally the year is up.
Any guesses at what happens?
The first man says the second was better
than he, and he is now forced to admit that
he does not have the money everyone thinks
he has, not even close.
The second man is speechless.
But before I say why, I thought I would
share with you a few of my thoughts about
this episode.
1. The man says he loves his wife. It
would seem to be part of the reason he
agrees to the bet. Does he really love
his wife? If so, is giving up a year of
his life worth the cost? Would his wife
agree? If so, does she really love him,
or what he can give her? Is loving her
really about giving her what she wants,
and is the cost of doing that worth it?
2. There never seems to be a signed
agreement. Why was the second man so
willing to give up so much without any
assurance that he would get what he was
told? How often do we give up parts of
ourselves in the expectation that we
will get something in return, only to
be disappointed? There are no guarantees
in life, but it makes sense to choose
wisely where we give our resources (time,
attention, energies) especially if the
dynamic is inequitable or there is a
possibility of no return. Not to say we
never should do things that are inequitable,
but just that we should be aware and mindful
of our choices and the related costs.
It turns out the reason the man was
speechless was because he didn't think
he could win the bet, so he had his
vocal cords cut.
It would seem to me that when we do
what another wants us to do we can
sometimes lose our own voice, just
like this man did. He did it willingly,
for what he perceived as a reward.
We may also lose our voice - also
willingly - by bowing to another's
desire, thinking in some way we are
gaining something when in fact we
could be losing everything.
That man's life would
never be the same.
Just like how when you don't
speak up for yourself and
you lose your voice; your life
will never be the same, either.
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