On Closure

One has to believe that on some
level we are always doing the
best that we can at any given
moment.

It is a good thing to know/believe
because so many kick themselves
when they believe that they are in
some way deficient.

This is not to say that we don't
always have opportunities to do
better, but just that we sometimes
need to be kinder to ourselves.

At the same time, though, it is
often a kindness that we give another
when we consider their needs. This
is not to override our own, however,
there are likely sometimes ways in
which there may be compromises made
that help another get what s/he needs.

All too often the way that some people
deal with things is not to deal with
them. Sometimes it would be hurtful
or painful to deal with them, however
many times the thought of pain is
more what is perceived to be the
possibility than what would likely be
the case.

So often things are not as bad as we
would make them out to be in our
fertile imaginings.

In addition, when we consider another,
we are allowing there to be communication,
that - left undone - leaves a hole for
both you and the other person.

Closure is just a way to end one chapter,
and begin another. Closure could also
be "THE END," but it need not be.

Closure is a way to acknowledge things,
and allow the parties involved to move
forward - together or apart - without
the past lingering or holding on and
potentially hindering the present.

The next time you consider not allowing
someone closure, consider you are not
doing yourself any favors, either.

There are all kinds of endings, and some
actually bring some beautiful new beginnings
that couldn't have happened without the
process of putting the past into perspective.

Sometimes people can get it on their own,
but it isn't the same as when it comes
from a mutual dynamic.

It's one of life's gifts to be able to
have closure in a mutually satisfying
way, but not often one that is accepted/
allowed, and most often the cause is
fear - F.alse E.vidence A.ppearing R.eal
(also F.orget E.verything A.nd R.un).

What may be holding you back may not even
be a "real."

As always, just my couple of cents, have
any you'd like to share?