Turmoil and Peace

Turmoil and peace often are related.

Sometimes you need some external
turmoil to bring some inner peace.

Sometimes external turmoil is
caused by a lack of inner peace.

There are times we don't want to make
waves, but at the same time, we need
to because it is time to make a change.

Change is uncomfortable, and even
more so when we fight it. You may
somehow think that you are doing
yourself (or perhaps even someone
you care about) a favor by not
making waves.

But if you are not at peace with your
life on the inside, you aren't doing
anyone any favors, and odds are sooner
or later things around you will change,
whether you want them to, or not.

It might be better to take a good,
long, hard look at things, and figure
out what it is that you do want, and
go about making changes. Things will
possibly be rocky, but I would bet
not as rocky as you might think.

However, however rocky it is, at the
other side is likely the inner peace
you've been wishing for. Life can be
challenging sometimes, but there are
times we seem to make things more
difficult for ourselves by fighting
what we already know.

In all of life there are cycles of
destruction followed by creation,
why would we ever think we were
exempt? What if we accepted that
sometimes things do - and need to -
change? Might we be happier and
better off for it?

I suspect the answer is yes, but
it doesn't really matter what the
answer is. If you are unhappy,
something has to change, if you
want to stop the unhappiness, and
there is a very good chance it
won't be any of the other people
involved.

There was a time in my life that
I knew something had to change,
but I just wanted things to work
out. I wanted the OTHER person
to see things my way. I wasn't
changing, the situation wasn't
changing, the other person wasn't
changing. I felt trapped, frustrated
and miserable - not to mention
scared - although at the time I
don't think I really acknowledged
my fears. Looking back, I'd say
my fears were a much bigger player
and decision-maker than I realized.

Eventually I took steps, as difficult
as they were, and backslid more than
once. Things finally came to a head,
and when the final step for lasting
change came, I couldn't have been
more relieved. What a difference.
As silly as it may sound, I felt like I
could breathe again. I had been holding
my breath for months, maybe even years.

That was a key time for me, and one I
often refer to. In looking back, I have
been able to move forward.

No one says you have to change, but if
you're unhappy, you may just want to.
Remember to be kind to yourself, odds
are you're doing the best you can.
While you're at it, consider looking at
turmoil as your friend, who's just
trying to help you get where you want
to be - whether you think you know where
that is, or not. :P